Holiday Guide to Self-Medication

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©2014 Michelle Freed

As we officially head into what many of us consider to be Pre-Holiday Crazytown, I have some bad news. You are most likely on the verge of a physical, emotional or mental breakdown.

Holidays can be hazardous to your physical, emotional and mental health. Duh.

Holidays can be hazardous to your physical, emotional and mental health. Duh!

Studies show that brain activity rapidly decreases 5-7 days prior to significant family gatherings, due to stress, overwhelming to-do lists and relatives who don’t know how to look anything up on the Internet. This means that your chances of contracting a cold or flu (and a diagnosable mental disorder) more than triple.*

Personally, I’ve already shown signs of logic and memory deterioration (example: I stored the glue gun in the oven and trimmed the refrigerator with tinsel). As an added bonus, this morning I discovered a box of nails hanging out with sandpaper and medieval torture implements in my esophagus. It’s not something I like to brag about.

The good news is that there are lots of ready-to-purchase, over-the-counter remedies for almost all pre-holiday ailments. It’s just a matter of knowing which ones to use at what time, which is why I’m here to help (hint: you might want to destroy your browsing history after reading this, should authorities or technologically savvy 10-year-olds get involved in the crime scene). Continue reading

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