Fifty Shades of Fruit Loops

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I saw Fifty Shades of Grey last week and contributed to a weekend box office record of $94.4 million in ticket sales. Since then, I’ve read impassioned pleas from mothers, advocates and well-intentioned citizens who are convinced this movie will lead to the moral decay of future generations.

fiftyAnd while I am the first to speak up against domestic violence and intimate partner abuse, let me set your mind at ease. Blaming this movie for the demise of healthy relationships in America is like blaming Fruit Loops for obesity.

Let’s start at the beginning. I didn’t read any of the E.L. James’s series, which apparently features bondage, discipline, sadism and masochism (BDSM) as one of the main characters, and has sold over 100 million copies worldwide. This wasn’t because I’m a prude, mind you. It was because so many of my writer friends warned me that the poor quality of sentences and paragraphs would send me into an emotional tailspin. Who would want that?

So when I went to the movie, my expectations were extremely low. I merely wanted to giggle with my girlfriend and consume champagne. In the dark and with popcorn. Continue reading

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